Ye are
probably all thinking I been quiet today. Well I been out with me mate Dirty
Gertie- so named because- well I best not go there! Well she wanted to go to
the new nail bar. I didn't want mine doing- I am practical and I have such
things as housework to do. Only yesterday I had to strip off and do me shimmy- ye know the vertical limbo and holding the
boobies to get in me skinny bitch shower to clean it. Has to be done naked for
practical reasons. Well I had to use the wire brush to scrub the crusty and
mouldy cracks and grannies. Or words to that effect. Ye can't be having nice
nails when ye have jobs like that to tackle!! Mines little sister (the one with
the issues, constipation, accidental blue hair and part time camel toe (by her
own admission)-) she got nice nails. I don't know how she gets on with her wire
brush cleaning. Anyways I went with Gertie to the nail bar. After she had her
nails done she went in the back room for a vajazzle. Well I was surprised cos
she don't normally do jewellery but she wanted to surprise the butcher. I am not keen on that either to be honest. Not
surprising the butcher (I am all for that- tis usually the postman or the bin
man here as ye all know)- but the vajazzle thingy- no I didn't fancy that. Un-hygienic
if ye ask me. But she did persuade me to
go in for the muff buff. Gertie wanted her muff buffed as well but they said
they couldn't do it. Apparently Sandblasting is strictly on Fridays. So we have
to go again to-morrow. But I tell ye I am fair knackered now so I am going to
have me kitty nap before I gets mines Mr Husbands dinner.
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