Monday, 13 July 2015

Nice Tits, Measles and Needing Stuffing



I have been to the doctors again today. I was quite well behaved I thought. Well until that woman got stroppy with me. I thought she had a nice body. Quite shapely. So I thought it would be nice to pay her a compliment. All I said was 'haven't you got a nice figure. Nice tits. Have you thought about getting a bit took of end of that nose?'. That was when the fight started. Good job by then I had already seen the advert about getting your kids vaccinated against measles before it comes to town. I have booked them all in for vaccinations and ear syringing. I thought may as well kill two birds with one stone. Anyway the waitress at the desk reckons that because my kids are now in their 20s and 30s they don't need measles jabs but I insisted on booking them in anyway. Don't think that waitress woman is all there to be honest with you. Of course I want my kids protected from the measles. Then after the Doctor told me I have this feckin arthritis crap in all my bones and joints and I will have to learn to live with the pain we went to look for some stuffing because I need stuffing. Not the kind you have with your Sunday lunch either. The kind you stuff a knitted snowman with. Mines Mr Husband found a blind woman wandering round the town. She was headed for the building site so he turned her round and took her to a bus stop. I thought 'eh up, he's pulled- I will just nip home for his suitcase'. Then he said goodbye to her and left her on the bus stop. I thought T'was a bit cruel leaving her in the road but he assured me that was what she asked for! So I thought I will help someone too. I grabbed an old lady and helped her across the road. She slapped me face. She didn't want to go across the road and she was only 23. Oh well, I tried. And I still need stuffing! Oh yes and Mines Mr Husband and I experimented when we went to bed last night-we tried sleeping in the same bed. He tried to turn me over at one point so he could have more bed! Cheek. I said 'this lady is not for turning-sleep in thee own fecking bed'. Anyways we trying again tonight.........................

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