Was off to a good start today:
Epsom Salt Bath had.......Check
Thyroxin...........Check
Workout and sing-along with Beth and Elvis.......Check
Cod Liver Oil (yuk) and fruit juice.......Check
CBD oil ................Check
Live yogurt, Nuts and Coconut...........Check
Lavender Tea..................Check
Then just waiting for me Rice Krispies to tell me what to do!
I Know ye all wondering what instructions the
rice krispies gave me today. Well they told me to take mines Mr Husband garden
centre shopping- he has truly only just stopped sulking!! It was a bargain- buy
one rose bush and get one free. He said 'we only come for a bag of potting
compost'. I said 'Me little garden will be all pretty and smell fragrant next
year, stop ye whining man. Not many girls got pretty and fragrant gardens so be
thankful'. Then, after lunch that we didn't have, he decided to take me in the
woods. I think it was all the garden talk. 'Let's go deep in the bush', he
said. Sounded good to me. I couldn't wait to get in the woods. Soon as I did I
stripped off and laid down on a nice little patch of woods. 'oh ye gods woman,
what be ye doing. Put ye clothes on'. I was confused to be honest. 'Ye said ye
were going to take me in the woods', I said. I was looking forward to this all
the way here. He just looked at me like I was a mad woman. 'Yeah, to take
photographs' he said. 'Glad ye cleared that up then' I said, 'I won't be
putting me clothes back on just yet, ye can do some au natural pics' I told him
as I draped over a log. (I got feckin splinters in places I can't show me
mother). He shook his head- tis not good when he shakes his head. ' I was
thinking more of taking pics of the tits', he said. That was easier to
understand. Why didn't he say that in the first place? 'I just put me trousies
back on then' I said. 'Tis going to be a topless shoot- I can do that'. He made
me put ALL my clothes back on. I told him some men would give thems high teeth
to photograph me topless'. He said 'I can photograph ye topless'. Then he took
his shirt off. It was all very confusing. After that we went deeper and deeper
into the bush because I thought I spied ye olde woodpecker (and a couple of
parrots) until we were 'temporarily geographically misplaced' (lost to you and
I, but the thinks he is posh- I told him even my mate Dave in Downing Street
don't say 'people keep telling me to get geographically misplaced' and he is
posh!). 'Ye feckin eejit', I said 'Ye have got us lost now'. He said 'Not I- I
was just following you'. 'Oh that's right', I shouted 'Blame me why don't ye'.
Then he started all that argumentative crap like 'YOU were leading. You were in
front. You said 'this is the way-follow me'. My argument is this- He could have
turned round and gone the other way at any time he liked. He said 'Then ye
would have been temporarily geographically misplaced all on ye own'. Well at least
I would have only had two of us to argue with and not three!! Still he got some
nice pictures but I don't think he will putting them up for ye all to see. He
be a meanie ass with his photos
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