No Knickers and Ropey Cocks

I know ye are all wondering what I am up to. I bet ye all thinking I be quiet. Well I ain't. And I can tell ye it's not just Septic Blaggard who has been having a tough couple of weeks with his Fifa. Nope. I have too. Not with Fifa though. I be trying to pack boxes among other things.( Depsite a devastating diagnosis this week on my health I am getting on with the packing. Can't be stopping to beggar about with pain.) Plus I had two shocks yesterday- Marguarite Pattern died aged 99- that was the first shock- the second was that she was still alive- I thought she was already dead. In fact I never thought about her at all really. Him at number 5 with the ropey cock lit a bonfire in the middle of the day- he got a piece of my mind I can tell ye. Twice. But I still ended up getting me washing in because he don't understand feckin sarcasm. I shall let the tyres down on his mobility scooter and shove his walking stick up his arse I shall. The agent did four viewings without ringing me first. I made him grovel and apologise. Then I made him do it again. He has cancelled tomorrows viewing at 9am because I told him I would be naked and on me wrecking ball. One woman viewing worked hard to convince me her dog was house trained and well behaved. 'Mrs', I said, 'it ain't my house- I don't care if he shits in every feckin corner'. But I did point out the mould in the bedrooms. Like to be fair I do. I don't care if they let it again or not. I also seen me osteopath. Strip to ye underwear please he said. 'Underwear? Underwear?- Feck- I knew I forgot someat!'. I stripped anyway. I asked him if he was stripping too. Then he told me to get dressed again. Can't make up his feckin mind I tell ye. Well I try to catch ye all again before me internet goes off after the weekend.